Getting Skinny In One Week

I've been in a bathing suit every day lately.  It is not a pretty sight.  I also have a vacation coming up that will mean 24 hour per day bathing suit wear.  I decided it would be a good idea to drop a few pounds.  Maybe ten, but possibly twenty.  In the next week.  Totally doable.  No problem.

I woke up at 5:30 a.m. on Monday all set to go.  I knew it would be simple, I will just not eat (ever again).  I poured myself a cup of coffee and got through all the morning activities of getting two teens out the door for school.  I also started perusing through my Reader in an attempt to get caught up with the world outside of Money Town.  Thinking to myself how absolutely fabulous I was doing, and how skinny I must already be, I glanced at a clock and realized it was only 7 a.m.  Maybe I should have slept in later, because damn if I wasn't  starting to feel just a little bit hungry.  The strange thing about it is the fact that I am not normally much of a breakfast eater.  I think I started feeling hungry only because I decided not to eat. 

Around 8 a.m. food started flashing at me from the Internet.  (I want to point out here that I had now been awake and busy for two and a half hours with just coffee to sustain me.)  What's up with these blogs deciding to share recipes at 8 a.m. on a Monday morning?  Let me add here, that these are not healthy recipes people are sharing.  Do these women live in places that do not require bathing suits?  Do they not realize it is June now and bathing suit season has officially begun?  Clearly they must not live in Southern California.  In addition, they cannot possibly live in the vicinity of Money Town where women simply do not eat – at all, ever.  (It is the exact reason why so many of these women are bioches – they are starving.)

I noticed that there is some leftover cheesecake in the fridge from TR's birthday celebration and as scrumptious as dessert with coffee is, I managed not to indulge with very little effort.  Sweets in the morning are not my thing.  (I have a girlfriend who lives for leftover dessert with her morning coffee.)  Nonetheless, I gave myself a pat on the back for not eating the food I never wanted.   

Next, I headed off to PT.  As The Torturer (who was in a foul mood) proceeded to act like a slave master, I wondered silently how many calories are worked off when he lifts and moves my arm for me repeatedly.  I surmise the more it hurts, the more calories burned.  He lived up to his name and my pain level sky-rocketed.  I decided the PT session must easily be equivalent to 1,000 calories burned in one sitting.

I returned home to find TR (this was before the train disaster) eager to go out to lunch.  TR is a size 2.  I suggested having lunch at home but she reminded me she would be leaving to return to college soon and that it is my job "to entertain" her when she comes home.  Fine, out to lunch we went.  I ordered a broth-based soup while Size 2 had soup as her appetizer and a gigantic burrito as her main course.  We came home and spent the afternoon in the pool.  I did my required PT arm exercises in the water and convinced myself they burned off at least another 500 calories.

After I hugged TR good-bye (50 calories at least!), I came home and stressed out completely about her train disaster.  Another 1,000 calories burned, don't you think?  I should be able to eat anything I want with all this activity.  I was then reminded I had two "starving" teen-aged boys.  At this point I was in dire need of some down time.  I suggested RC (old enough to drive) run them out for a quick bite to eat while I recover from all the train/vampire stress.  Once they were out the door, I assembled a plate of fresh fruit and yogurt for myself.  An introvert at heart, I settled in with one of three books I'm reading (simultaneously – weird, I know).  In what seemed like only a moment, the boys had returned and were requesting leftover cheesecake for dessert.

I served up dessert easily, grateful again that I don't have a big weakness for sweet stuff (with the exception of PMS-required chocolate).  After cleaning up the mess, I returned to my book.  It wasn't such a hard thing, this dieting stuff.  With all my activity I'm sure I burned off at least 5 pounds on my first day alone.          

3 Responses to “Getting Skinny In One Week”

  1. Tricia

    The day’s stress sounds like it was absolutely worth five pounds, maybe six. The will power alone to dish up dessert took off another pound, at least.

  2. Tricia

    The day’s stress sounds like it was absolutely worth five pounds, maybe six. The will power alone to dish up dessert took off another pound, at least.

  3. Tricia

    The day’s stress sounds like it was absolutely worth five pounds, maybe six. The will power alone to dish up dessert took off another pound, at least.


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