Earlier this week a commercial came on for a new TV series about adult swingers. Briefcase and I shared a raised eyebrow. "I can't believe they are producing a show on that," I declared. Briefcase smirked. (Men are so immature, aren't they?) I knew right then I better get this post out before people start assuming I got the idea from the series.
No, Briefcase and I are not Swingers (with a capital "S" today). At least, I am not a Swinger and as far as I know Briefcase is not. Briefcase travels a lot though so, really, who can say? If he's swinging, however, he's swinging without me. Nevertheless, right in Money Town there is an organized Swinger's Club. Someone, I believe, forgot to tell them that the sixty's are over.
Initially I thought all the members were ranging in the 50-60 age range, but recently I heard that is not necessarily true. I was a little disappointed; doesn't it make much more sense if they are all just aging hippies from the Free Love Generation? However, just last week a girlfriend recounted an experience she recently had with Swingers from Money Town who are only in their late twenties and early thirties. Apparently, Swinging knows no boundaries based on age. Perhaps, since these individuals all live in Money Town, it is a function of the excessively rich and bored. Exactly why anyone in their 30's would want to swap partners with someone in their 60's is beyond me though. (However, I will contemplate the thought of a 25 year old man's body for a few moments, just in the name of research.)
Thursday night is Swinger's Night at one of our popular local restaurants. This is not a function determined by the restaurant, but it is a reality because the Swinger's have made it one. It took me awhile to figure this out, being a little slow on the uptake as I am sometimes. After several occasions of being at the same restaurant for Girl's Night (also on Thursday) it finally dawned on me. Those slimy men wearing long chains? Yeah, those guys aren't just hitting on me because of my amazing beauty. It was a little hard to come to grips with that. For some reason they like to slime up against me as they walk past and I always feel like maybe they left snail tracks on me or something.
A friend of mine has a daughter who works as a hostess at this particular restaurant. The daughter confirmed "Swinger's Night" as a regular event. Her dad was appalled that his daughter (age 17) would come home and recite Swinger stories after her night at work. Mind you, this is an upscale restaurant in an affluent area. The majority of time it is patronized by nice, normal folks. Not to say that Swingers aren't nice, normal folks ….
I guess Swinger's need a night out once in awhile too (?), but the whole situation makes me feel a little uncomfortable. I have stopped frequenting this particular restaurant on Thursday evenings. I would not be nearly as uncomfortable if the Swingers weren't always so friendly to me. I am a "live and let live" type of person, but it is not quite the same when I seem to attract these folks. (And all other sorts of other pervs, I might add. I don't know why that it is? Why am I a perv magnet?!)
In any case, a friend recently relayed a story about the Money Town Swingers to me. She was at a party when the evening "pool party" all of a sudden went naked on her. The next thing she knew there was quite a bit of "girl on girl" action going on in the hot tub and husbands were taking photos to memorialize the evening. She left – in a hurry. Some of the rich folks around here? They've got too much time on their hands.