If You Can't Rock Me

As I publish each night this week, I will never know whether or not my posts will show up with little squares all over the place.  I loved the comment one reader left stating I just need a little pac-man to start roaming my blog eating all the little squares!  Readers, thank you for keeping your sense of humor!  For my subscribers, the little squares might be coming through your Readers as question marks.  My apologies to everyone on behalf of Typepad.

One other quick tangent before you read today's post … The Torturer felt inclined to leave a comment on yesterday's post.  He left it under the shorter post describing the technical problems I was having, but it is in regard to the marshmallow post.  Some of you may be interested in clicking here to see what The Torturer had to say.

The Southern California sun was still sweltering in the early evening.  We arranged our fold-out chairs on the lawn.  Behind us stood a breathtaking lake and picturesque mountains. 


In front of us, the lawn was covered with chairs, blankets, coolers, and a mass of people. 


Looming in front of the crowd was a stage. 

I was anticipating an entertaining performance.  We had been invited to an outdoor summer concert in a community near Money Town.  The advertising was specific, we would be experiencing The Rolling Stones music until dark.

We made ourselves comfortable for the evening.  A booth was selling barbecue tri-tip sandwiches to satisfy our eventual hunger.  Anticipating the heat, we knew quenching our thirst would be an ongoing challenge.  Fortunately, we had a cooler of lemonade with us.


The mood was casual and festive.  Suddenly the band appeared.  I immediately knew the evening would make great writing material.  This band was not just going to play Rolling Stones music.  The band members actually believed they were The Stones.  Yes, they even adopted fake British accents when they spoke to the audience.

Fake Mick Jagger made his entrance in full costume.  His cape, his hat, his scarf, his make-up, it all must have been stifling in the heat.  He quickly shed the hat, but he wore his scarf for the entire concert.


I kept waiting for him to pass out from the heat.  He never did.  The music was … just fine.  Meaning, it was okay, entertaining, but lacking somewhat in energy.  A far cry from a real Rolling Stones concert.  The more lemonade I drank, the better they sounded. 

The crowd was, for the most part, dressed casually in shorts and t-shirts.  There were a few exceptions.  (I was having camera problems, excuse the photo quality in these shots!)


This gentleman wanted to share his physique with the audience.  He continually paced in front of the stage so the entire crowd was forced able to look at him.

Briefcase instantly fell in love with Pink Lady.  He couldn't take his eyes off her all night.


Pink Lady is the antithesis of the woman Briefcase chose to marry.  Pink Lady also brought with her a white poodle dressed in pink.  Not only did the white poodle have pink clothes, it also had a pink rhinestone collar and a pink leash.  I would shoot myself in the head before I would ever dress like this or buy pink clothes for a dog.  I am lacking the girly-girl gene. 

I'm sure this next lady is a very nice person.  However, let her be a lesson to women everywhere.  Muffin tops are never an attractive sight.  Not even when you have size D fake boobs to counter the muffin top.  It just isn't open for debate.


I've tried to hide the identity of some of these people.  They are probably very nice people.  The next couple was hard not to watch.  My friend and I imagined an entire scenario around their lives just by observing them throughout the concert. 


What does this photo tell us?  A nice middle-aged OC couple.  Typical fake boobs on the woman, but that's nothing unusual in Orange County.  What was funny to watch, however, was her body language.  It seemed to transmit, "Get me away from this guy."  He, however, could not get enough of her.  As the night progressed, and presumably the more he drank, the more he rubbed up against her.  He thinks he's getting lucky.  She seems to want to run away. 

This woman was the center of attention all night and she knew it.


Most of the other people attending were dressed like this.


The lady in white was visiting from Money Town.    


But you probably already guessed that. 

12 Responses to “If You Can't Rock Me”

  1. Judi

    I think that tribute bands are popular for city-sponsored outdoor concerts in OC these days. My hubby and I have seen both “the Beatles” and “Queen” this way in the last few years. In a couple of weeks we get “Bruce Springsteen.”

  2. kelly

    The torturer can’t seem to take what he can dish out! He’s upset you said he’s got a beer belly.

  3. Tricia

    Who needs the Stones when you have this kind of people watching to entertain you? And, I’m so glad you were experiencing technical difficulties… older guy without the shirt, he doesn’t need to be more in focus. When women’s sides bulge over their pants, we call it muffin top. What do you call it when a man is bearing way to much and everything is bulging?

  4. Ry

    Love that the torturer commented!
    I love this entry! I want more photos of anonymous OCers! It’s like a whole new world to me. I promise I’ll go take some shots of NYCers for you.

  5. alntv

    Holy crap! What a great idea! People watching from my computer at an event I didn’t attend! Oh…I am so doing this when I have to do more traveling this football season…
    This is soooo awesome! HA!

  6. Lori

    Just recently found your blog and I love it! We have some things in common…I also have an injury and live with a lot of pain 24/7 so my heart really goes out to you and all that you have been through…I so relate to when you talked about your life before your accident and life afterwards…completely different and I understand how depressing it gets when you look towards the future with a life of pain.
    I also love people watching and outdoor concerts…great pictures by the way. And isn’t it something to watch these people and wonder if they looked at themselves in the mirror before they walked out the door…and really wonder if they just don’t care that their muffin top is hanging all over the place…it’s just not attractive on anyone. I also watch people and make up senerios about their lives…so much fun.
    Anyways, great blog…I love your blogs name…I feel like I am 24 at heart even though I have kids older than that!

  7. Jason

    What a fun night. Drinking Mike’s, taking photos and planning a fun post.
    Fascinating, as usual.

  8. jo

    I love people watching! Back from vacation and did loads of left-coast people watching. Love comparing it to the “heartland”. Where are you John Cougar-Mellencamp?
    This was so fun. I thought muffin-tops only existed in the midwest! For shame…..west-coast chicks with muffin tops! Honestly. What’s the world coming to?


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