The Haters

I've been writing Twenty Four At Heart for less than a year.  I've already had some pretty amazing, positive, experiences as a result.  I've learned a lot and I've enjoyed myself tremendously in the process.  I've come to know a lot of fabulous people I never would have met otherwise.

My biggest regret so far, is posting about PT yesterday simply the lack of time I have to devote to this endeavor.  I wish I had more time to read other people's blogs and more time to write my own. However, I have to devote myself to my recovery first and it consumes an inordinate amount of my time.  

The time suck of my recovery is something most of you understand.

Last August, I got my first Internet Pervert Communication.  I refer to it as my IPC.  It was before any of my posts on the gender gap or sex related topics.  Pervert went away, and that was the end of him.  

I've been writing about sex ever since.  I keep trying to get him to come back but he never has.

A few weeks ago, I got my first "hate mail."  Or should I say, I got my first hate email? I don't know why I found it so shocking, but I did.

I'd like to point out it was not from The Torturer.  (No, he saved all his hate up for the text messages he was sending me from Las Vegas last night.)  

Wouldn't you think he'd have better things to do in Vegas than read Twenty Four At Heart?  
Apparently not.

Anyway … back to previously scheduled programming.

For my readers who are new to the Internet world, we refer to "haters" as trolls.  

I've never had my own troll before.

This particular troll, by the way, is not a local reader.  My troll is from Utah.  I also have many very nice readers in Utah.

I read the email and then I re-read it.  In case I misunderstood what I was reading, I read it one more time.  Don't get me wrong, it isn't like it devastated me.  I was, however, floored by the intensity of anger and hatred.  Then I became curious as to what must be going on inside the person who wrote it.

Logically, of course, I fully understand if I choose to put my writing on the Internet I'm opening myself up for criticism, misunderstanding, dislike, being beaten by The Torturer and whatever else.  I know that.  I'm still surprised anyone reads what I write in the first place.  It's astounding to me to realize someone would not only read what I write, but decide after one visit here that I'm worth the time and energy to compose and send a hateful email to. 

It wasn't even a controversial post.

I mean, I would understand if someone objected to me making fun of a thrust counting cock ring.  Or if, perhaps, they were appalled my kid was walking around near-blind while I was unaware of his need for glasses.

If my writing upsets a reader … why not just move on?  

Was the hatred even really about me, or my writing?  Or was I just an excuse for this person to unleash some anger?

What makes a person into a hater?

78 Responses to “The Haters”

  1. Helena

    I think you’re on the right track when thinking you’re just an excuse for someone to unleash his/her anger. Who turns into a hater? A sad, lonely person with severe lack of social skills.
    Keep on writing! We all rely on you for entertainment. Not least The Torturer. Lol!

  2. Helena

    I think you’re on the right track when thinking you’re just an excuse for someone to unleash his/her anger. Who turns into a hater? A sad, lonely person with severe lack of social skills.
    Keep on writing! We all rely on you for entertainment. Not least The Torturer. Lol!

  3. Helena

    I think you’re on the right track when thinking you’re just an excuse for someone to unleash his/her anger. Who turns into a hater? A sad, lonely person with severe lack of social skills.
    Keep on writing! We all rely on you for entertainment. Not least The Torturer. Lol!

  4. Alan

    Oh…I hate you something AWFUL!!! Taking up all my time in the morning when I COULD be reading the paper and eating my cereal. Damn you 24!!! Damn you…

  5. Alan

    Oh…I hate you something AWFUL!!! Taking up all my time in the morning when I COULD be reading the paper and eating my cereal. Damn you 24!!! Damn you…

  6. Alan

    Oh…I hate you something AWFUL!!! Taking up all my time in the morning when I COULD be reading the paper and eating my cereal. Damn you 24!!! Damn you…

  7. Jan

    Congratulations – you’ve pissed someone off on your blog!! (I was going to say you’d pissed off a Mormon, but that would be too terribly un-PC, not to mention perpetuating a Utah-ian stereotype, which just wouldn’t do.)
    Now, see – this is why I aspire to be you.
    (If I get hateful remarks via your blog, does that count?)

  8. Jan

    Congratulations – you’ve pissed someone off on your blog!! (I was going to say you’d pissed off a Mormon, but that would be too terribly un-PC, not to mention perpetuating a Utah-ian stereotype, which just wouldn’t do.)
    Now, see – this is why I aspire to be you.
    (If I get hateful remarks via your blog, does that count?)

  9. Jan

    Congratulations – you’ve pissed someone off on your blog!! (I was going to say you’d pissed off a Mormon, but that would be too terribly un-PC, not to mention perpetuating a Utah-ian stereotype, which just wouldn’t do.)
    Now, see – this is why I aspire to be you.
    (If I get hateful remarks via your blog, does that count?)

  10. Carole

    I enjoyed your post yesterday! Not sure what post your troll complained about but Screw them. If they dont like it dont read. Kinda simple isn’t it? Not much you can do about unattended Dolts lurking around the net!
    carole
    xoxo

  11. Carole

    I enjoyed your post yesterday! Not sure what post your troll complained about but Screw them. If they dont like it dont read. Kinda simple isn’t it? Not much you can do about unattended Dolts lurking around the net!
    carole
    xoxo

  12. Carole

    I enjoyed your post yesterday! Not sure what post your troll complained about but Screw them. If they dont like it dont read. Kinda simple isn’t it? Not much you can do about unattended Dolts lurking around the net!
    carole
    xoxo

  13. Margie

    I wouldn’t worry about it. I read other blogs and some of them get the trolls too. As they say, there’s “one” in every crowd. Just keep writing but be careful of the Torturer. I’m guessing you did get some messages from him after yesterday’s post. HeeHee

  14. Margie

    I wouldn’t worry about it. I read other blogs and some of them get the trolls too. As they say, there’s “one” in every crowd. Just keep writing but be careful of the Torturer. I’m guessing you did get some messages from him after yesterday’s post. HeeHee

  15. Margie

    I wouldn’t worry about it. I read other blogs and some of them get the trolls too. As they say, there’s “one” in every crowd. Just keep writing but be careful of the Torturer. I’m guessing you did get some messages from him after yesterday’s post. HeeHee

  16. EricaB

    Ooohhh, I will be looking for hater comments – so much fun 🙂 Congratulations! You have made it to the big league!

  17. EricaB

    Ooohhh, I will be looking for hater comments – so much fun 🙂 Congratulations! You have made it to the big league!

  18. EricaB

    Ooohhh, I will be looking for hater comments – so much fun 🙂 Congratulations! You have made it to the big league!

  19. Lori

    I don’t know how anyone can hate you because you are all kinds of wonderful. I don’t understand people that can’t play nice…who can’t just click away if they don’t like something that someone has written…it’s one thing to disagree but damn it, can’t they at least say it in a respectfully nice way?!

  20. Lori

    I don’t know how anyone can hate you because you are all kinds of wonderful. I don’t understand people that can’t play nice…who can’t just click away if they don’t like something that someone has written…it’s one thing to disagree but damn it, can’t they at least say it in a respectfully nice way?!

  21. Lori

    I don’t know how anyone can hate you because you are all kinds of wonderful. I don’t understand people that can’t play nice…who can’t just click away if they don’t like something that someone has written…it’s one thing to disagree but damn it, can’t they at least say it in a respectfully nice way?!

  22. Kelly

    You are the BEST! I laughed my ass off yesterday – as I do many mornings when I read you. Screw the troll. It isn’t about YOU.

  23. Kelly

    You are the BEST! I laughed my ass off yesterday – as I do many mornings when I read you. Screw the troll. It isn’t about YOU.

  24. Kelly

    You are the BEST! I laughed my ass off yesterday – as I do many mornings when I read you. Screw the troll. It isn’t about YOU.

  25. Di

    The best ones are when they write hate e-mail and then you visit their blog page and it’s all about how they are ‘come to Jesus’ people…. *shakes head and does not get those folks at all* Not saying all hate e-mail writers are Believers, just saying it’s really odd when I run across that.
    Di
    The Blue Ridge Gal
    (if I don’t like a post I generally try not to comment at all)

  26. Di

    The best ones are when they write hate e-mail and then you visit their blog page and it’s all about how they are ‘come to Jesus’ people…. *shakes head and does not get those folks at all* Not saying all hate e-mail writers are Believers, just saying it’s really odd when I run across that.
    Di
    The Blue Ridge Gal
    (if I don’t like a post I generally try not to comment at all)

  27. Di

    The best ones are when they write hate e-mail and then you visit their blog page and it’s all about how they are ‘come to Jesus’ people…. *shakes head and does not get those folks at all* Not saying all hate e-mail writers are Believers, just saying it’s really odd when I run across that.
    Di
    The Blue Ridge Gal
    (if I don’t like a post I generally try not to comment at all)

  28. Linda

    I don’t understand haters. I’ve clicked over to a lot of blogs from comments and meme’s and such. If I don’t like what I find I just don’t go back. Why would I write a mean, hurtful comment just because I disagree with what was written? I truely do not understand this. I’ve been reading here for a while now and IF I disagreed strongly with something you said/did I would probably NOT say anything. Mom always said “If you haven’t anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”.

  29. Linda

    I don’t understand haters. I’ve clicked over to a lot of blogs from comments and meme’s and such. If I don’t like what I find I just don’t go back. Why would I write a mean, hurtful comment just because I disagree with what was written? I truely do not understand this. I’ve been reading here for a while now and IF I disagreed strongly with something you said/did I would probably NOT say anything. Mom always said “If you haven’t anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”.

  30. Linda

    I don’t understand haters. I’ve clicked over to a lot of blogs from comments and meme’s and such. If I don’t like what I find I just don’t go back. Why would I write a mean, hurtful comment just because I disagree with what was written? I truely do not understand this. I’ve been reading here for a while now and IF I disagreed strongly with something you said/did I would probably NOT say anything. Mom always said “If you haven’t anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”.

  31. thistle

    ah yes…the morality police…it’s a pity that ivory towers hve such small narrow windows.

  32. thistle

    ah yes…the morality police…it’s a pity that ivory towers hve such small narrow windows.

  33. thistle

    ah yes…the morality police…it’s a pity that ivory towers hve such small narrow windows.

  34. Lo

    well i’m half-asleep so forgive. but seriously, who gives a flying fuck. pardon me. ahem. some people are just miserable by trade and want everyone else to join on in their pity party. i’m pissed someone sent you of all people hate mail- you are flipping awesome and i love you- but other than sayin’, brush yer shoulders off, i wouldn’t give them anymore time. some people are so ridiculous… sitting athome without anything to do, deciding to attack people they don’t even know.

  35. Lo

    well i’m half-asleep so forgive. but seriously, who gives a flying fuck. pardon me. ahem. some people are just miserable by trade and want everyone else to join on in their pity party. i’m pissed someone sent you of all people hate mail- you are flipping awesome and i love you- but other than sayin’, brush yer shoulders off, i wouldn’t give them anymore time. some people are so ridiculous… sitting athome without anything to do, deciding to attack people they don’t even know.

  36. Lo

    well i’m half-asleep so forgive. but seriously, who gives a flying fuck. pardon me. ahem. some people are just miserable by trade and want everyone else to join on in their pity party. i’m pissed someone sent you of all people hate mail- you are flipping awesome and i love you- but other than sayin’, brush yer shoulders off, i wouldn’t give them anymore time. some people are so ridiculous… sitting athome without anything to do, deciding to attack people they don’t even know.

  37. Kristan

    On the one hand, it’s fascinating to contemplate people with so much anger inside them, to wonder why it came to be that way — but on the other hand, it’s far better NOT to understand.
    I’m sure you already know, but don’t let it bug you.

  38. Kristan

    On the one hand, it’s fascinating to contemplate people with so much anger inside them, to wonder why it came to be that way — but on the other hand, it’s far better NOT to understand.
    I’m sure you already know, but don’t let it bug you.

  39. Kristan

    On the one hand, it’s fascinating to contemplate people with so much anger inside them, to wonder why it came to be that way — but on the other hand, it’s far better NOT to understand.
    I’m sure you already know, but don’t let it bug you.

  40. Midlife Mama

    When I posted some political stuff, I attracted several trolls. They spew such hatred I haven’t posted political posts since. I don’t want to be censored; yet I refuse to give these trolls a forum for which to spew their hate. If they had simply emailed me, I could deal with it. But the hateful comments that they filled my blog with was so toxic. Just keep doing what you’re doing and forget them.
    It is shocking, though. Isn’t it? I hated getting those comments.

  41. Midlife Mama

    When I posted some political stuff, I attracted several trolls. They spew such hatred I haven’t posted political posts since. I don’t want to be censored; yet I refuse to give these trolls a forum for which to spew their hate. If they had simply emailed me, I could deal with it. But the hateful comments that they filled my blog with was so toxic. Just keep doing what you’re doing and forget them.
    It is shocking, though. Isn’t it? I hated getting those comments.

  42. Midlife Mama

    When I posted some political stuff, I attracted several trolls. They spew such hatred I haven’t posted political posts since. I don’t want to be censored; yet I refuse to give these trolls a forum for which to spew their hate. If they had simply emailed me, I could deal with it. But the hateful comments that they filled my blog with was so toxic. Just keep doing what you’re doing and forget them.
    It is shocking, though. Isn’t it? I hated getting those comments.

  43. Undomestic Diva

    Welcome to the Blogosphere where people can be complete assholes and remain anonymous if they feel like it… which, in turn, allows them to be even bigger assholes.
    If this were “real life,” they wouldn’t have the balls to say shit to you.

  44. Undomestic Diva

    Welcome to the Blogosphere where people can be complete assholes and remain anonymous if they feel like it… which, in turn, allows them to be even bigger assholes.
    If this were “real life,” they wouldn’t have the balls to say shit to you.

  45. Undomestic Diva

    Welcome to the Blogosphere where people can be complete assholes and remain anonymous if they feel like it… which, in turn, allows them to be even bigger assholes.
    If this were “real life,” they wouldn’t have the balls to say shit to you.

  46. Mama Dawg

    And unless they come back, you’ll never know exactly what it is that prompted the hatred.
    Trolls suck.

  47. Mama Dawg

    And unless they come back, you’ll never know exactly what it is that prompted the hatred.
    Trolls suck.

  48. Mama Dawg

    And unless they come back, you’ll never know exactly what it is that prompted the hatred.
    Trolls suck.

  49. Renee Couturier

    Like I tell my kids, they are probably jealous of you. I know I am.

  50. Renee Couturier

    Like I tell my kids, they are probably jealous of you. I know I am.

  51. Renee Couturier

    Like I tell my kids, they are probably jealous of you. I know I am.

  52. MLS

    I believe it’s all about the shock factor to see what sort of reaction they can get. They got what they wanted and that was “attention”. You gave it them with this post, which will either make them crave more or move on to another challenge.

  53. MLS

    I believe it’s all about the shock factor to see what sort of reaction they can get. They got what they wanted and that was “attention”. You gave it them with this post, which will either make them crave more or move on to another challenge.

  54. MLS

    I believe it’s all about the shock factor to see what sort of reaction they can get. They got what they wanted and that was “attention”. You gave it them with this post, which will either make them crave more or move on to another challenge.

  55. Chris

    Screw him or her….you’re fantastic!! You make me laugh!!
    I can’t think of anything that you have written that would upset or offend anyone. Oh wait…maybe its own of those Housewives!!! Keep it comin!!

  56. Chris

    Screw him or her….you’re fantastic!! You make me laugh!!
    I can’t think of anything that you have written that would upset or offend anyone. Oh wait…maybe its own of those Housewives!!! Keep it comin!!

  57. Chris

    Screw him or her….you’re fantastic!! You make me laugh!!
    I can’t think of anything that you have written that would upset or offend anyone. Oh wait…maybe its own of those Housewives!!! Keep it comin!!

  58. Sandi

    I HATE TROLLS! They find me and lash out and I wonder the same things you do, like if you hate me so bad, why do you read me? Just move on and don’t come back. I don’t get it either!

  59. Sandi

    I HATE TROLLS! They find me and lash out and I wonder the same things you do, like if you hate me so bad, why do you read me? Just move on and don’t come back. I don’t get it either!

  60. Sandi

    I HATE TROLLS! They find me and lash out and I wonder the same things you do, like if you hate me so bad, why do you read me? Just move on and don’t come back. I don’t get it either!

  61. KJ

    I always saya, fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke. Pretty much my sentiment here. This is an unhappy person who chose you to take it out on. I’d really just forget about him/her.
    On the positive side, I have heard that if you don’t generate some controversy, you’re not doing your job! 🙂

  62. KJ

    I always saya, fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke. Pretty much my sentiment here. This is an unhappy person who chose you to take it out on. I’d really just forget about him/her.
    On the positive side, I have heard that if you don’t generate some controversy, you’re not doing your job! 🙂

  63. KJ

    I always saya, fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke. Pretty much my sentiment here. This is an unhappy person who chose you to take it out on. I’d really just forget about him/her.
    On the positive side, I have heard that if you don’t generate some controversy, you’re not doing your job! 🙂

  64. San Diego Momma

    Seriously? I think haters are insecure and envious, and need to knock others down a notch b/c they need the satisfaction of feeling above someone.
    Not seriously? OMG! Dooce is your troll!

  65. San Diego Momma

    Seriously? I think haters are insecure and envious, and need to knock others down a notch b/c they need the satisfaction of feeling above someone.
    Not seriously? OMG! Dooce is your troll!

  66. San Diego Momma

    Seriously? I think haters are insecure and envious, and need to knock others down a notch b/c they need the satisfaction of feeling above someone.
    Not seriously? OMG! Dooce is your troll!

  67. Katy

    I bet it was one of The Torturer’s women. She’s probably just visiting Utah. She probably gets jealous of you. Ha! How could anyone hate you? You make our day – every day!

  68. Katy

    I bet it was one of The Torturer’s women. She’s probably just visiting Utah. She probably gets jealous of you. Ha! How could anyone hate you? You make our day – every day!

  69. Katy

    I bet it was one of The Torturer’s women. She’s probably just visiting Utah. She probably gets jealous of you. Ha! How could anyone hate you? You make our day – every day!

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