A few weeks ago something amazing happened. Briefcase was gone on one of his long trips. One night he called home and excitedly informed me his boss (the CEO of his company) had just given us an all expenses paid trip to St. Lucia. Apparently his boss was having a fleeting moment of guilt for working Briefcase's ass off. He decided to send us on a trip as a thank you.
Are you asking where the hell St. Lucia is?
Can you see the map or is it too small? St. Lucia is an island north of Venezuela near Barbados.
His boss even gave us an "Adventure Guide" to look at ahead of time. I can't wait to swim in the Caribbean Sea.
I've been to the Caribbean before. I've been to Cancun and Aruba on two separate trips. Briefcase and I also honeymooned in Bermuda. Bermuda is in the Atlantic but hell, it's an island and it's sort of over in that same part of the world.
Maybe not really, but all those islands are east of California so that puts them practically right next to each other.
Maybe geography is not one of my strengths? (It's because I have no sense of direction whatsoever. Who can keep track of where all the islands are anyway? All we really need to know is they are in the ocean somewhere.)
I've never done the whole Caribbean island hopping thing. It's much easier to get to Hawaii from California so most of my island time has been in the Pacific.
I don't know much about St. Lucia but I did find a couple pictures online.
It looks very pretty. And warm. And tropical.
Insert Twenty Four At Heart right onto that beach. It looks like heaven, doesn't it?
We're trying to lock down the exact dates to enjoy this unexpected gift. (It's a one week trip.) In fact, I'm still pinching myself in an effort to see if I dreamt the whole idea of someone giving us a free vacation.
We don't have family close by to watch the kids so I'm trying to figure out what to do with them while we're gone. There's all sorts of other details I need to think about too.
For example, if we have a family member fly in to stay with the boys at our house where can I hide our stuff?
Well … *ahem* you know. Stuff like the toys one of my readers sent me a few months back? Because, you know damn well, if my in-laws are in our house they will find the toys and declare me a skank.
Oh wait – they already have declared me a skank!
Oops. I'm not allowed to write about
my in-laws certain people things.
Also, only a few of my family members know about Twenty Four at Heart. What happens if someone uses my laptop while I'm away and discovers my writing? Or some of the humorous responses to my writing like this comment from Sarah yesterday:
I would so want a big dick if I was a man and a hairy chest too : )
I laughed at Sarah's comment. In fact, I showed Sarah's comment to The Torturer and several friends at PT yesterday and we all laughed. My in-laws? Well, they wouldn't laugh. It would just be another nail in my coffin. They've already picked out my gravestone and it's engraved SKANKY BITCH.
There are a lot of details to think about when an unexpected trip is thrown at you. Like, how the hell do I get in a bathing suit when I'm not at all ready? How much weight can I lose if I live on nothing but water until we depart? If I exercise every day will I get buns of steel and firm thighs in no time flat? Should I get a standard or Brazilian bikini wax? And, how do I keep from getting a terrible sunburn when it's winter here and my skin is not even slightly tan yet?
Not to mention … Does anyone know what people wear in St. Lucia?
© Twenty Four At Heart