Believe it or not, I'm still trying to recover from the crud that took over my lungs last week.
I have the energy of a snail on a snail's most relaxed day.
Nonetheless, I did have enough energy to snort out loud when a man introduced himself to me last weekend.
His name is Mr. DeCock.
His first name is Pat.
That's right … Pat De Cock.
I couldn't make up a name like that if I tried. And yes, I did guffaw out loud before I could stop myself.
I'm sure he's used to it?
Can you imagine growing up with a name like that?
Can you imagine some young girl having a crush on him and thinking to herself, "When I grow-up I want to be Mrs. Pat De Cock."
I met one of The OC's most obnoxious women recently too. There are a million other women just like her here, but I have to wonder why?
What is it about Orange County that makes women so insecure?
Or are insecure woman driven to come here by some magnetic force of the Pacific Ocean?
Why are they so in need of proving to the world they are important by collecting material things and plastic body parts?
More importantly …
Why don't they all know to stay away from me or I will make fun of them?
They should know that about me by now, don't you think?
And yes, I am talking about you …
The one with the Louboutin shoes, $3,000 designer purse and spinach in the cleavage of your store-bought double D's. (The spinach dropped out of the veneers on your teeth and hung on the cleavage area of your dress. You might have noticed if your botoxed face could have forced your eyes to look downward.)
* Ahem *
Sometimes I feel like the only person in Orange County unimpressed by wealth. Don't get me wrong, I'd love to win the lottery as much as anyone else.
Unless it made me like them, and in that case, I'd prefer not to.
Some of the most pathetic, empty, shallow people on earth live here.
Shoes, and handbags, perfect plastic body parts, and model-homes don't impress me.
Oh, but people with kind hearts?
Whether they have money or not, the people with kind hearts –
They impress me.
P.S. (Did I mention I won $2 in the MegaMillions lottery last week? That should help out with college costs for my kids, don't ya think?! Woo Hoo!!)
P.P.S. Happy Birthday to my longtime and very dear friend, Nike!! xo
© Twenty Four At Heart