Way Worse Than Whiskers!

You've heard me bitch and moan about my experience on Prednisone and all the bad side effects it caused.  Trust me, there are plenty of bad side effects to complain about.  I've mainly told you about the weight gain because it just seems so damn unfair to be put on a drug that makes you blow up like a balloon. 

There was another side effect to being on Prednisone which was really too horrible to even mention.  In fact, I was so humiliated by the experience, I vowed never to tell anyone what happened.  But … now that I'm OFF the drug, I've decided I can share.

Are you ready for this?

I had a pubic hair grow right out of my face!

YES, I DID!!

It wasn't the "facial fuzz" many women get as they hit their forties, and it wasn't even a long, normal, type of hair.

It was a damn pubic hair growing out of my cheek.  (The upper cheek on my face, to be specific.)

You can imagine my horror!

I get brazilian bikini waxes so I don't have hair down there, let alone sprouting right under my eyeballs.

One day, just a couple weeks ago, I happened to glance in a magnifying mirror.  I use the magnifying mirror for applying makeup.  The only makeup I wear on a daily basis is mascara so I don't spend much time looking in this particular mirror … but there I was checking myself out.  (I should also mention I have pretty bad eyesight so the only time I really know what I look like is if I happen to glance in this particular mirror.)

All of a sudden, I gasped out loud and exclaimed, "No!!"

But?

YES!

There was a dark, thick, wiry, curly, pubic hair … about AN INCH AND A HALF LONG coming out of my face.  (Below my eye, up high on my cheekbone!)

I swear, it grew over night.  I'm quite sure it hadn't been there the day before.  Even with my imperfect eyesight, surely I would have noticed a long black hair growing out of my cheek?

"How is that possible?" my stunned brain wondered.

I have small blond hairs on my arms and legs ….

I don't have big, thick, wiry, curly, black hair on my body anywhere.

There are no words to describe the alarm, the disgust, the abject terror, I experienced in those first few seconds.

"Steroids!  Prednisone!" my inner voice screamed.

"Dammit!" I muttered out loud.  

It didn't take me more than two seconds to pluck that pubic hair right out of my face.  I'm all about aging gracefully, and taking meds when the doc insists on them.  I will not, however,  have my face turn into an outlet for anatomically confused pubes.

I was, of course, immediately terrified pubic hairs would suddenly start sprouting all over my face – perhaps over my entire body.  What if I suddenly had pubic hairs growing out of my ears?

Aaack!

Every day since, I've looked in the magnifying mirror … wondering what I might find.

Mirror, mirror on the wall …

I'm happy to report, I haven't had a single pubic hair grow out of my face since.

© Twenty Four At Heart

17 Responses to “Way Worse Than Whiskers!”

  1. Sheppitsgal

    Not to worry you or anything, but what if one grows DURING THE DAY while you are OUT and ABOUT??? Horror!
    You’re welcome (lol) x

  2. Ginger

    Ha ha, only you! You have the CRAZIEST things happen to you! But at least you care. I know a woman who has a huge wart on her chin with
    SEVERAL black wiry hairs sticking out of it! Whenever I talk to her, it’s hard not to stare at it, because it moves up and down when she talks, ya know? Anyways, I’ve always wondered….does she think that looks SEXY or something?! I would die of humiliation, myself.

  3. Jenny in MN now AZ

    Not many could pull off writing about facial pubic hair! Thanks for the laugh today.

  4. linda

    Horror is right!!! I can relate. I have a small scar just under my chin. About the time I turned 40 it started sprouting big, thick, black hairs!! Every.Single.Day I check my chin because they DO grow overnight!!! GAAAAAAA!!!

  5. Jan

    Ever since I hit perimenopause, I’ve had to deal with the random, occasional whisker. Never under my eye, though! Usually on my chin or upper lip.
    Oh, and because of this, I never go ANYWHERE without a pair of tweezers. Well, except through airport security – the one time I did, they pulled me over, rifled through my purse and carry-on, felt me up and waved a metal detector over me. For tweezers. Isn’t it nice to know the TSA has their priorities in order?

  6. Freda

    Well done for sharing that. Medication side effects can be pretty off-putting so I’m not going to share mine…..yet!

  7. Linda

    I will not, however, have my face turn into an outlet for anatomically confused pubes.
    Funniest thing I’ve read in a looooooong time! : )

  8. Barb

    YOU are so freakin funny I love reading your blog, it gets me through the day!!!!!

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