Holiday Tips

Life gets hectic this time of year, doesn’t it?

There’s so much to do, and it all needs to be done on top of everything we normally do anyway.

Photo of our Christmas tree, still undecorated.

Every holiday season that goes by, I learn a few new things.

I thought I’d share a few of my Holiday Tips with you.

Maybe your life will run smoother as a result?

  • A major blog re-design and the launching of your new photography website should never be attempted within two months of the holidays.
  • Let me repeat:  Don’t screw with your blog (or your business) around the holidays.
  • Warm, melted, brie topped with a pecan/brown sugar/butter glaze and served with sliced fresh fruit makes an easy treat for guests.
  • After your dog acts ape-shit for a couple hours (causing you to lose your patience and tell him to SHUT UP), you’ll discover a mountain lion has come to visit your neighborhood for the holidays.
  • Apologizing to your dog proves you’re willing to acknowledge your mistakes.  (P.S.  He’ll still think you’re a good person.)
  • Apologizing to the mountain lion is not necessary.  He’s an uninvited guest.
  • The two lights on the hood of your stove will both burn out at the same time.  Replacing them will require the complete disassembly of the f*cking stove hood.
  • It takes several people to change a light bulb, in some situations.
  • Very ignorant people design stove hoods.
  • Those minor home electrical problems you’ve been ignoring?  They’ll explode (literally) when you plug in your outdoor Christmas lights.
  • A black-out due to said electrical problems might be “just one more thing” in a day filled with holiday mishaps.
  • Every gift you put off buying, will be out of stock by the time you try to find it.
  • Being handy with a computer is a good thing when it comes to making pretty “I.O.U.’s” to put in people’s stockings.
  • Getting your mail each day will create incredible guilt if you’ve decided not to send out holiday cards for the first time ever.
  • If you wait long enough to do your holiday decorating, you’ll do a lot less – because, why bother for just two weeks?
  • Your husband will be a grouch as a result of holiday related Honey-Dos.
  • Turning up the volume of Christmas carols on your stereo will drown out the sound of your husband’s complaints.
  • All those pain meds you hate to take – will be a very welcome thing when the pain you live with reaches staggering levels.
  • Staggering by definition means un-f*cking believable.
  • Never buy a REAL tall Christmas tree if you’re afraid of heights and/or ladders.
The ladder and the twelve foot tall, very fat, Christmas tree.
I hope the above tips help you to have a less stressful holiday season!
Lastly, I want to thank all of you for your patience as I continue to work out the kinks of my blog re-design.
I’m so grateful – I have the best readers in the universe!

5 Responses to “Holiday Tips”

  1. Diane

    Oh girl… I’m with you when it comes to stupid stove designers as well as stupid microwave designers who also require that you take every blessed piece apart on the damn thing in order to change the light in it! My husband just cringes… sometimes I think it would be easier just to go buy an entirely new microwave!!!! And grumpy husband at Christmas time? Oh ya… I have one of those too!

  2. Jan's Sushi Bar

    Like Diane, our microwave requires dismantling in order to change the light bulb. Which probably explain why the my microwave remains dark when we use it.

    But I think I’ll go home and hug my stove vent – the light bulbs are exposed and you just unscrew the old one and screw in the new one. After you take a second mortgage out on the house, because the #$@%ers are *expensive*.

  3. LindaP

    Ai recommend a Deep cleansing breath and a very tall Starbucks with a double shot of Bailey’s!


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