TGIT … Yes, TUESDAY

Mentally, I was prepared for a very productive week.

My productivity lasted until I woke up on Monday.

Monday morning got off to a very bad start.

Mocha, my chocolate lab, came to wake me up.

My dog, acting as an alarm clock, isn’t unusual but there was a series of unexpected events after she showed up.

The series of unexpected events ended with my arm popping off my body.

I can’t tell you how much I hate it when my arm pops off.

There was a sickening sound, the nauseating sensation of an unconnected arm,

And, of course, a lot of pain.

It ruins my whole day when my arm pops off.

I texted Paul Newman and told him my arm had popped off.

He’s been avoiding me  busy lately so I didn’t hear back from him until the end of the day.

He asked what I was doing when it popped off.

“It’s kind of a long story.  I was in bed ….”

“Say no more.  I get it.”

Well, fine.

I’ll let him think there’s a better story to go with my popped off arm than there really is.

A short while later, when I was brushing my teeth,

I noticed something odd about my mustache.

I shouldn’t have worried because it was just a large, extraordinarily ugly, pimple parting my mustache hairs.

You know, directly under a nostril where it could wave to anyone who talks to me.

I decided to discard my previous photography plans for the day since my arm was no longer attached to my body.

Instead, I got dressed and made a trip to the grocery store.

I’ve been wanting to make this recipe from the latest issue of Bon Appetit.

I was pretty sure I could still make it with only one arm attached to my body.

pork-tenderloin-with-date-and-cilantro-relish1-700x500

 

A quick stop into our closest Whole Foods was in order.

Of course, I forgot our Whole Foods is a hangout for beautiful people looking for other beautiful people.

I felt self conscious the minute I walked in wearing hole-y yoga pants and old flip flops.

I tried to quickly gather the three ingredients I needed.

As I stood in line to pay, I noticed I had a super attractive male cashier.

Dark, curly hair ….

A white, bright, bleached-teeth, perfect smile.

I reminded myself it would be very cougar-ish of me to notice a 20-something, right?

He kept staring at me.

And staring at me.

And then?

I realized he was trying to figure out what was waving at him from beneath my mustache hairs.

I paid him and scampered out of the store as fast as I could.

I knew, right then, I’d spend the remainder of the day working at home.

P.S.  The recipe was fantastic and I don’t even like pork.  I’ll try to post it sometime in the next week because I know sometimes clicking on a link takes too much effort.

P.P.S.  Paul Newman and I are spending the morning together.  I’m pretty sure I’m not going to love him pushing my arm back in place.

6 Responses to “TGIT … Yes, TUESDAY”

  1. Jan's Sushai Bar

    Oh, dear – I hope Paul Newman does you a world of good today.

    I’m probably going to make the pork recipe sometime this week, too. If it’s good – and since I trust you, I know it is – I may post it, too. Because you know I won’t follow the damn thing exactly. 😉

    • Suzanne

      I think it is only fitting that we both post it. After all, you are a food blogger and know what you’re talking about … and I’m just a crazy lady in Orange County!
      : )

  2. Erica

    I’m sure Mocha did her best. I had a miniature poodle for a while (under ten pounds) and had to have stitches replaced when she woke me up the day after I got home from surgery. Thank goodness she wasn’t bigger.

    The meal looks delicious and I hope they figure out how to keep your arm in place permanently someday. Even if a fix does restrict movement a bit, it would minimize pain.

    • Suzanne

      Mocha always has good intentions, but she can sometimes be overly enthusiastic.
      : )

      I’ve heard rumors of a possible fix for my arm popping off my body. But, it is a nasty surgery with no guarantees. Not sure I’m willing to go through another one. Nine is enough …

  3. Julie in Michigan

    Oh my gosh, thanks for the good laugh! I know I can relate to the “looking ugly” moment in public. But, we are beauties on the inside so that’s all that matters!!

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