Trolls and Assumptions

Yesterday’s post received a “negative” comment.

In Internet language we call it a comment from a “troll.”

A troll is someone who hides behind anonymity to make nasty comments.

I don’t get a lot of troll comments, but I get them occasionally.

Hey, I realize if I put even a small fraction of my life out into the public domain some people are going to have an overwhelming urge to throw rocks at me.

I can’t say I understand it, but I know it’s a fact.

(By the way, what I write about publicly is only a very teeny, tiny, sliver of my life.  To make giant assumptions about me based on very little information is really foolish.)

Usually, I delete hateful comments with very little thought.

But, yesterday’s comment made me laugh.

I thought I’d share it today, along with my own commentary.

A nurse at the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota wrote the comment.  I’ve included my responses in bold next to her comments in blue.

Same content day after day, year after year.   No, actually it is not.  Last week I wrote about my trip to shoot Texas.  A month or two ago I was writing from Vancouver Island in Canada.  Sometimes it’s about people, or pictures, or puppies, or current news events.

The sexiest and BEST therapist and pain doctors, surgeons, the OC has to offer; nary a word about the RNs who most likely see you too.  OK, so you’re a nurse and you don’t feel appreciated.  That much is very clear.  I’m sorry people don’t tell you they appreciate you more often.  

Second, I don’t consider any of my therapists or doctors “sexy” let alone “the sexiest.”  

Paul Newman is attractive, I suppose.  I know this, because I see the way women act around him.  I, personally, don’t think of him as “sexy.”  He really isn’t “my” type, but I can see why some women are attracted to him.  I absolutely will ask him to do a little hip swishing (swaggering?) for me when I see him today.  Maybe that will cause me to think of him as “the sexiest”???  That is, if I can stop laughing.

My doctors?  Well, I’m pretty sure they aren’t sexual people.  At least, I’ve never thought of them that way … and I’d prefer not to.

As for “the best” medical people?  Well, I do feel I have the best in Orange County.  And yes, it’s a subjective thing, isn’t it?  But, my orthopedic surgeon takes care of Olympians and my pain management doctor has been written up in journals all over the country as being “the best” at what he does.  I feel very fortunate to have them caring for me.  Are there other doctors just as good as they are?  I sure hope so.  I hope a LOT of people are fortunate enough to have the great medical care every single person deserves.

As for the nurses …

Well, this is clearly a hot button for you, isn’t it?  (By the way, I want to take a moment and say hello to Joanne one of my oldest, and best, friends who is a nurse.  Hi Joanne!  I love you and appreciate you even though you have never been *my* nurse.)

There are no nurses at physical therapy which is where I spend the vast majority of my medical time.

My orthopedic surgeon and my pain management doctors are not only my doctors, but they also became my friends years ago.  They don’t send a nurse to see me before they see me.  I’m sorry if that’s disappointing.  They just come right into the room to chat.  And, will it shatter your world if I tell you it isn’t unusual for them to text me or for me to text them, just randomly from time to time?  Sometimes we text about my arm, but it could also be about a photo, or travel, or … something entirely different.  (I think my last text with Dr. Painless was about his wine collection.)  

Of course, there were nurses in the operating rooms during all nine of my surgeries.  I was under the influence of anesthesia in all those instances so I can’t remember them.  I’m sure they were wonderful human beings.  I’m also pretty sure they understand I was unconscious and couldn’t voice my appreciation.

Chronic pain, pain meds, yet somehow you’re able to start a company and haul heavy equipment around, not only haul the equipment around but then set it up, get into all sorts of weird positions in order to get that perfect picture.  And your point is …??  Would it be better if I sat on the couch all day and watched soap operas?  I could weep about the pain I live with during the commercials?  Are you trying to tell me I’ve done the wrong thing by trying to carry on with my life, and make myself productive, after the accident?  Would it be better if I just “gave up?”  I have learned to do a LOT with just my left arm.  I’m very proud of all I’ve learned to do.  I also get a lot of help from people who carry my equipment, rolling cases, and other means.  And guess what?  You can’t make me feel bad about how much I’ve accomplished.  It sure hasn’t been easy … in fact, it has been damn hard.  I’m proud of every single accomplishment.

And you do all of that on strong strong narcotics that you are “not addicted to”.  Well, here you go making HUGE assumptions about me and my life.  Are you my doctor?  Do you know what drugs I take?  Or when?  Or how often?  Well, the answer to those questions are no, no, no, and no.  You know nothing – absolutely nothing about this topic.  (For that matter, you know next to nothing about me.)  I actually DON’T do all that while on strong narcotics.  I certainly don’t have to tell anyone what medications I take.  But, I will just for shit’s sake, okay?  
I mainly take a hell of a lot of Advil.  It’s very bad for me, according to my doctor.  He wishes I would take narcotic medications more often because he feels they’re safer.  But?  I don’t like feeling foggy-headed so I mainly take Advil.  (Three at a time since you seem so interested in my personal life.)  Sometimes I get injections of Toradol  (It’s a non-narcotic pain reliever … like a stronger Advil.)  I also have Toradol (non-narcotic) pills I take as needed.  
Now, it is true, I did take narcotic medications right after every single surgery.  And, from time to time, I still take narcotic pain medications … but only on the very rare occasion.  For instance, I took narcotic medications with me when I went on my five day shoot a week or two ago.  I didn’t take any of them though.  I probably should have.  I was really in severe pain.  But, I needed a clear head to work so I didn’t.  When I got home, I did take one after my first PT session.  I was in a lot of pain.  But really?  Is that any of your business?
Also, I’d like to make a point here.  Why do people always assume if you have chronic pain you’re an addict?  Or, if you see a pain management specialist, you must be an addict?  What an ignorant assumption.  Did you know the vast majority of people who are addicted to narcotic pain meds are NOT pain patients?  It’s true.  The vast majority of pain med addicts are people who started taking pills for recreational purposes (often mixing them with alcohol) and became addicted.  Do some pain patients become addicted to pain meds?  Yes, a small percentage do.  Most, however, don’t.  Check your ignorant stereotypes at the door, please.
Let’s not forget how you arrive at destinations to take those pictures: you get behind the wheel of a car while on narcotics.  Well, there you go making ignorant, and completely inaccurate, assumptions about my life again.  Really, this statement is laughable.  Do you think I would risk hurting someone with a car in the same manner I was disabled?  Think before you speak.  Or write.
Hmmmm. I read your blog maybe once a year, the content rarely changes. Neither do the pictures.  Well, isn’t that funny?  Because my blog has a statistics program and I can clearly see you’ve visited many more times than once in the last year.  And, guess what?  I’ve never posted the same content twice with the exception of my pumpkin chocolate chip cookie recipe.  (It was very requested so I re-posted it a year or two later.)  I also don’t repeat photos ….  So, again, you are saying ignorant and inaccurate things.
So that’s it folks.
I did get another message from Mayo Nurse, but I haven’t had a chance to read it yet. (I spent a lot of yesterday hugging a beautiful newborn boy!)I’m sure message number two from Mayo Nurse is just as friendly as her first message.I don’t know about YOU, but I’m sure glad this particular person has never been MY nurse.

The lack of compassion, the ignorance, the resentment and anger, the willingness to spew hateful untruths under the cloak of anonymity …?

I really do feel sorry for people who depend on her for care.

I do hope all the rest of you, however, have a wonderful weekend!

8 Responses to “Trolls and Assumptions”

  1. Missy Stalcup

    I feel better on your behalf! Good job clarifying Suzanne! We love all your work.

    • Suzanne

      Thank you Missy.

      Obviously, I have very little patience for ignorant people.

  2. Joanne

    While I read twentyfouratheart regularly, I have not left a comment in a good while. Today is the day!
    I would like to say a word to Mayo Clinic nurse (troll).
    Dear “Nurse”,
    First and foremost, your comments discredit a world renowned facility, The Mayo Clinic. Shame on you. Hopefully, you are a troll calling yourself “a nurse”, when you really are just somebody else. In my small, midwest healthcare facility, even the housekeeping staff has more compassion and understanding of “pain” than you. Your ignorance in regards to the topic of “pain” is mind-boggling.
    Next, you discredit the field of nursing and healthcare, in general. Your judgements are sickening.
    Lastly, if you had even a speck of knowledge on the topic of pain, and other topics such as dependence, tolerance and addiction, you would understand that quality of life is the goal of a successful pain management program.
    The fact that Suzanne has a life, started a successful business and manages to haul around equipment, demonstrates that she has been cared for by excellent specialists. It doesn’t hurt that she is incredibly intelligent and strong-willed! Are you jealous, Mayo Clinic Nurse? By the way, please query the definition of “addiction”. Addicts do NOT improve the quality of their life by using/abusing narcotics.
    One more thing…(once again, you would understand this if you knew anything about managing chronic pain)…her blog would be considered “adjuvant therapy”. Look that one up, as well.

    • Suzanne

      Joanne,
      Thank you.
      You worded your response perfectly.

  3. Jenny i

    Are you f’ing kidding me? That person is an idiot! DITTO on everything you said!
    Oh good grief… Jerk person – go away!

    • Suzanne

      Yeah, it was really ignorant.
      I know there are a lot of clueless people in the world, but the whole thing was ridiculous.

  4. Robyn

    My only thought is WHY? Why does she read your blog if it seems to fill her with so much hate? If she doesn’t like it, then leave. Stop coming back. Simple. I don’t understand people.

    • Suzanne

      A lot of people want attention … anyway they can get it.

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