She’d just turned sixteen when she had her first sexual encounter.
There’d been some kissing (with clueless boys) before that, but not much more.
Ellen had been asked to house sit for vacationing family friends, Matt and Kathy.
She’d jumped at the chance.
A week of acting like a grown-up.
A week without annoying parents.
She’d invite friends to stop by.
It was summer –
She had a house to herself!
Ellen had been house sitting for two or three days when it happened.
House sitting was fun, but maybe not quite as much fun as she’d hoped.
A knock on the door one afternoon didn’t surprise her.
It was probably her friend Carrie stopping by.
Instead, when Ellen opened the door, she saw a very big man standing there.
“Is Matt home?” he asked cheerfully.
“No,” Ellen answered.
“Really?” the man asked, seeming puzzled.
He went on to explain his name was Terry.
He was Matt’s best friend.
Ellen instantly lit up.
Although she’d never met him, she’d heard Matt mention Terry many times during the last couple years.
Apparently, there had been some type of communication breakdown between Matt and Terry.
Terry needed some papers from Matt.
Terry seemed puzzled. He said he must have been confused about Matt and Kathy’s vacation dates.
He thought he knew where the papers were if he could just come in for a minute and grab them …
Terry was Matt’s best friend.
It didn’t occur to Ellen to doubt him.
Ellen opened the door wider.
Terry came in.
She let Terry come in.
The door closed …
And then –
She was being thrown against a wall, violently.
Terry had morphed from a cheerful man at the door, to an angry monster attacking her.
Her clothes were ripped off.
Trying to fight against Terry proved to be useless.
He picked Ellen up and threw her over his shoulder as if she were weightless baggage.
A moment later she was tossed on Matt and Kathy’s bed.
She tried to run –
She was brutally slammed against a wall.
Like a rag doll, she thought repeatedly.
He tossed her around like a rag doll.
She was shocked at the sight of the first adult penis she’d ever seen.
It was so big.
Terry was a big man.
He was strong and powerful.
Ellen felt like a toy in comparison.
How much time passed?
A few hours, at least.
He assaulted her repeatedly, but the worst part of the attack were the words coming out of his mouth –
Mean, angry, hateful, unforgettable words that would terrorize her for years after the physical wounds had healed.
Before he left,
He carried her to the shower –
His anger had dissipated as quickly as it had arrived.
Terry cleaned himself up.
He held her under the spray of the water.
He toweled them both off, dropped her on the bed –
Then he dressed and left.
She waited until she knew he was really gone,
Then Ellen, sobbing, called her friend Carrie.
Carrie came over immediately.
She stayed with Ellen for a few days.
For several years, Carrie was the only person Ellen told about the rape.
Ellen felt so ashamed –
She felt so stupid for letting that bastard in the house.
She blamed herself completely for what had happened.
Everyone knows not to let “strangers” in the house.
If her family found out, they’d be ashamed of her stupidity –
And angry with her for “having sex.”
She couldn’t bare to tell them.
She couldn’t bare to tell anyone.
The things she later learned about Terry made it worse.
He was 35 years old, and married.
He had, unquestioningly, known Matt and Kathy were out of town.
He had also known they had a “young teen girl” house-sitting in their absence.
Terry was the father of two kids.
He was an ex-college football player. He was 6’4″ tall and well over 200 pounds.
Ellen was 5’5″ and 115 pounds.
She had never had a chance against him.
Maybe the worst thing she learned later, was the revelation of Terry’s occupation.
He was a college professor.
He was around women – lots of women – every day.
It took several years, but (in time) Ellen realized the rape wasn’t her fault.
She had been a child.
Terry was a grown man, and a predator.
With that realization another type of shame was born –
For the rest of her life,
Ellen would wonder –
Were there others?
And if so, how many?
If Terry did rape other girls –
She was to blame.